Everyday

Everyday I wake up, I never really know how I'm going to feel. Sometimes I feel lacking. Sometimes I feel content. Sometimes I am worried. Sometimes I am sad. Sometimes I am really excited. And sometimes I am just tired. But every day I wake up, and I make myself aware of what I'm feeling. Because ignoring the messages we receive from our body and brain and lying to ourselves to say that everything is just fine when it isn't is a dangerous game to play. I have negative emotions. I have positive emotions. I have neutral emotions. Sometimes I don't react very well to those emotions. Sometimes I am ashamed of my negative emotions, because I live in a world that devalues the importance of those emotions and I feel bad for having them. And sometimes I am ashamed that I am ashamed of my negative emotions, because I am someone that believes every part of me is valuable no matter what the rest of the world believes and should not be required to suppress them. But every morning I wake up and take stock in what I feel and why I'm feeling it and where it can possibly go from here. And every day I am challenged by nothing more than my own desire to understand those emotions, to find a way to become a better person than I was the day before. Everyday I test my courage to be less hypocritical than I was the day before. And everyday I confront the weaknesses I find or have been brought to my attention by others. Some days I succeed. Some days I fail. And every day I go to bed with a secure knowledge of that success and/or failure. And every day I go to bed thankful that the morning will bring a fresh start to gain even higher ground on my achievements or turn around and overcome my defeats. Everyday I wake up, I never really know how I'm going to feel. Sometimes I feel lacking. Sometimes I feel content. Sometimes I am worried. Sometimes I am sad. Sometimes I am really excited. And sometimes I am just tired.